Obeinous Times: Young Girls Family Vanished From Existence.
Last week eight-year-old Molly Pebble found herself home alone. Her family had been completely wiped from existence. At least that’s the conclusion she’s come to because she only has vague memories of a family.
“I woke up Tuesday morning, expecting my mum to have made me breakfast but then I remembered I don’t have a mum?” She said to me, still looking very shook by this experience.
After leaving the house confused and alone, she walked into the city centre. She found the manager of Woolworths, William Moore, who both mismanages the only good store on this island and won’t give his loyal customers parking.
“I recognized him. I used to get pick & mix there. I thought he seemed like a trusty adult.”
He wasn’t though. William or ‘Willy’ as his merry band of councillors call him, promised to help her but she found herself in even more danger under his guardianship. This is typical Willy, if like a responsible adult he gave her over to the police and went back and managed his shop, which was closed by the way. I went down there to get the latest Westlife single, walked there mind you, because there is no parking! I walked down there, with my bad hip, and low and behold closed!
“The Woolies man was there and The Postman, I thought they would help but they didn’t. I took them back to my house and they had a look around and I told them about my weird oven.”
Molly’s oven is supposedly cursed. It has small goblin creatures that live in it, called the cleaners. Every night at 6 they clean the oven. The only rule that she knew about them was to not call them Wiggled Onions.
“So they looked at my cursed oven, The Postman went off to find out about it and Willy would stay with me and look around the house. The Postman didn’t come back and Willy went outside and started fighting some people chasing Goblins.
William, who I would like to add is on the town council, left this girl to go save some Goblins. This girl clearly has been cursed with Goblins. I would also like to note that on his staff is a horrible little Goblin that is currently on the run from the police.
How long will we let this stand? Our mayor is a Goblin, there are Pixies and Gnomes going to our sacred church. All the council in charge cares about is the monsters in the forest, not our own people! If they had as much energy sorting out this town as they do chasing monsters, we would have our bins collected more than once a week and I wouldn’t have to fly-tip next to the church."
I asked her what happened after William was beating up some people to protect his precious fae creatures.
“Well.. We went to look for his friend.. And he just kind of left me there.” He started crying as she said this. “I was just wandering the island looking for someone to help but that’s when I found Former Mayor Swarm of Bees. He took me in as if I was one of his own”.
There you have it! A swarm of bees have more common sense and compassion than the manager of Woolies. I say disbar him and have a new manager put in.
Molly still hasn’t found her parents so if you do see them about then let them know Molly has been looking for them.